Reaching out to the True Self

Today a took a moment, and perhaps unwarrantedly took a listen to Sarah McLachlan‘s “Building a Mystery” song.  I can’t admit that I’ve heard this song since I was in high school—the thought took me back to a more innocent time, before I forgot myself.  Here’s what I want to remember…

…at my grandmother’s birthday party—92 years young—(though I was off a year at first)—I was fortunate enough to see, for the second time, a harpist who played for her and her guests as she had a previous year.  She was found (again) on the internet, with help of recognizing her face—that’s a subject for another post.



Cross harp. Picture taken by Erika Malinoski a...

Image via Wikipedia


However, this was astounding—I asked my brother, who had set it up for her to come and play for my (our) grandmother, something profound about life (as I am apt to do with him) and he told me about a conversation that he had partaken of with her after the party, while we were all juggling the clean up—myself with (now) 3 boys, and making sure someone was with grandma…

…so, what I asked, I don’t remember, but here’s what he said:

I saw this woman (the harpist) and I thought she must have been in her 30s.  She’s actually over 50.   I attribute this to her playing the harp and making things of beauty for the last 40 years.

When I asked him what he would do if society would collapse, or rather, if he was concerned (and/or worried) he told me, that know.  Why “worry?”  It only takes away energy that can be spent on making things of beauty that have never before been on the earth.

It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.

~ Gabriel Garcia Marquez ~


I’m glad for her to have spent that time.  Oh, how I wish everyone did that, or could.

It’s been a particularly heavy day, and as I write this I’m letting myself return to my 70-90+ words-per-minute typing speed that I have on a conventional keybaord, my DVORAK learning temporarily put aside.  It feels good to fly again for a moment.

So what does this all mean?  Just that I’m re-examining my life, what I’m doing, and how I’m doing.  I want to make things of beauty.  Someone close to me told me that my blog should include more personal insights or unique content and ideas—as I have so much to share.  And there’s more to do than that.  You might’ve noticed little illustrations on the sides—that’s just a taste of what I’d like to do.  Thankfully…

I’m remembering myself now.